10. TIE Wasabi/The Onion Volcano
The reverse onion volcano that you'll find at Benihaha's is a good visual for what your nose feels like when you eat too much wasabi. Shit will clear you out better than Drano.
Video Evidence: Steve-O Snorts Wasabi and Wasssssabi!!!
9. Sumo Wrestling
In Japan if you're a big fat ass you're honored as a national hero...In the US if you're a big fat ass, you're removed by crane from your home to get the hospital so they can remove the remote control that became fused to your thigh.
8. The Vapors "Turning Japanese" being about masturbation
What do you mean you didn't know that...Everyone knows that...
7. Oh's 868
Let Barry Bonds have Hank's MLB record, he's still no where near Sadaharu Oh's all time baseball record of 868 home runs for a career. Who cares if the outfield fences in Japanese parks are as short as the Little League field in Williamsport, PA, he's still the only All-Japanese player most of you can name.
6. Scarlett Johansson's Ass in that Bill Murray goes to Japan movie "Lost in Translation"
How was UB to know that the most watchable thing in that awful movie would happen in the first 30 seconds...
5. Japanese Products
Cucumber Pepsi
Sauce dispensing chopsticks
Condoms for kids
Breast Milk by the carton
4. Gedde Watanabe losing his shit in Gung Ho
Forget the scene where he freaks out in the river, remember when Hunt gets fired... "Oh yeah, if you're so great, how come you lost the big one?"
3. Yoko Matsugane
2. Hideki Okajima
Forget Dice-K, Okajima was the real Japanese star last season...
1. TIE Godzilla/Voltron
Now if only we could see that fight...
